Watching Telly: Dale’s Great Getaway

Right, we’re back from watching Dale’s Generation Ga… Dale’s Great Getaway I mean and now I’m going to talk about it. This will be going out late December in a primetime slot, and as such I won’t be giving away anything relating to results. In fact if you want to know anything about it (I will go into the games used) I will hide it under the cut so you can avoid spoilers of what looks like a one-off with a view to a series.

OK, this filmed in big old Studio 1 at The London Studios. It was a full audience. Warm up man was Kevin Devine off of That’s Life with Esther Rantzen (actually also the Holding Out For a Hero pilot), and the suggestion was he warmed up In It to Win It recently as well. Celebrity TV adjuducator Olivia van der Werff was also on hand.

• The set is like an airport departure loungs, albeit in pastel. The three families come in through the “arrivals” tunnel in the middle of the audience and sit in the waiting area to the left of set. The middle of set is dominated by a large departure board which is constantly flicking. The right of the set is a screen on a set of double doors where Dale enters, surrounded by Virgin-esque cabin crew. Who dance. It reminded me just a little of Boys and Girls. Interestingly this showed a big “Dale Air” sign on it before recording, but no mention of this is amde during recording. Which is a shame I think.
• Each of the families are introduced – each is made up of four members. Looks like they’re all over eighteen.
• Each family will be going away on a holiday. But the question is where? The longer they stay on the show the better the holiday, and the family who wins Dale’s Greatest Getaway will also have a chance to win £15k spending money.
• Each round is introduced with Dale saying “let’s go global!” The map on the doors zooms in to a country and a short animated infromation film is played, narrated by none other than THE ACTUAL REAL JUDITH CHALMERS OFF OF WISH YOU WERE HERE? (who, incidentally, was enjoying the show from the comfort of being in the middle of the audience – solidarity!) The suggestion is that these were the wackiest games on television. None of the families know what the games are going to be in advance.
• Each game is based around something specific to a country. The first round was based on Mexico. The mariachi band from the Doritos adverts came in and played four mariachi interpretations of pop classics. The families had to name them by writing them down on boards. There was some confusion as to whether “Pricetag” was acceptable for “Price Tag”. Each correct answer earnt a point.
• Round Two comes from Switzerland and it’s milking goats that have been bought into the studio. Dale has a chat with the Fraulein to get advice for the contestants. She demonstrates using a finger on his hand. Only one member of each family plays, all the milk they collect is emptied into a tube to determine the points they earnt.
• Round three comes from Italy and three opera singers, who appear to be a successful group who I have never heard of, sing a song in Italian whose name I forget. They were very good though. After their demonstration, each family must put one of their members up to have a go and try not to look too much of a tit (although no family member can take on more than one solo challenge). This being done, the three Italians mark them out of ten in generous Gen Game style marking for enthusiasm.
• Round four, and the family with the lowest score after this round will be going home. And it’s the Yes/No game from Albania. All the contestants have to do is nod or shake their head at the questions they’re being asked, each one worth a point, but the thing with Albanians is that they shake their head to mean “yes” and nod their head to mean “no”. The questions were quite tricky as well (“In Albania does a person move their head vertically to mean “yes”?)
• The family with the lowest score here wins a comedy holiday at a location revealed by the departure board. It’s a pity they don’t use the departure board for more really. Then they’re waved through the double doors. They should totally have made a “wish them well, the X Family departing now!” send off. Something like that.
• The other two teams go through to the head to head and once again it’s time to go global! And this time we’re off to The States where the DC Cowboys, a homosexual dance troupe who did very well in America’s Got Talent come on and performa routine. Then the two families will also get a go at joining the troupe, and three of the members decide which one was better. The losing family get their holiday in a rather better place than the first family.
• This leaves one family left who have won Dale’s Greatest Getaway. But before they find out where they’re going they get the chance to win spending money. On the doors celebrities will appear and on the departure board two places will appear (apparently the names of local airports). The family must determine which one is the celebrities birth airport (i.e. which of these cities was the celebrity born?) The first four are worth £500, £1,000, £1,500 and £2,000 for up to £5k total.
• The fifth one is optional and worth £10k and they must risk all the money to go for it (the holiday is safe and guaranteed). If they decide to to go for it they must pick one person to answer, the rest must sit out. If they’re correct they win all accumulated money, if not they win no money. I think with a return at worst of 2-1 and with the guaranteed holiday you won’t see money people turn down the gamble. Win or lose, the holiday is then revealed to everyone.
• OK, so it’s The Generation Game ITVed up, there’s no point trying to hide it. It’s a noble idea but there a few problems which hamper it.
• Dale Winton’s the wrong host for it (he said himself he hadn’t really done anything like this before) – what the show needs is a comic and people person like (yes) Paul O’ Grady who can milk the laughs from situations. We love Dale, don’t get us wrong, but there’s never really the potential of the idea that he might get involved at any point, and for the goat milking we got several minutes of no real interaction or commentary at all which is the lifeblood of this sort of thing. I look forward to seeing how that edits.
• The end game is ten minutes of guessing where foreign celebrities were born. As a rule such narrow areas of knowledge serve to mainly bore most of the audience. Certainly if I knew that’s what the show was building up to every week I probably wouldn’t stick around. As a rule, mainstream appeal tends to demand things that are rather more general.
• The games weren’t really that wacky or indeed all that original (milking animals? Beat the Star. Everything else? Generation Game. Celebrity birthplaces on a departure board? Er, Busman’s Holiday *cough*) although some showed signs of being mildly clever.
• Here’s the thing. Here is what it all boils down to. Is there an audience for a good natured (and it is good natured family fun) members-of-the-public-making-an-arse-of-themselves show in 2012? Everyone says they want it, but then they get what they want and nobody seems to watch it, and my heart says this is going to go the same way. There is little killer here. I think it might get 3.5-4m against light competition in primetime, otherwise it is fairly forgettable really.